Well hello there! I’ve been off on other novel planets for a short but intense while, and have emerged to discover that I am 44. FORTY-FOUR. That was the footy number of my first love. I was eighteen then, and from my devoted position on the boundary of freezing Launceston footy fields, the idea of actually being forty-four had not entered my consciousness. But here I am. Saying things like, […]
I am sitting in my sitting room (as you do) in damp pyjamas. They are particularly damp about the breastage area so I look like I have leaking boobs. Their elastic has gone (pyjamas, not boobs…well, actually boobs to some degree) and I’ve had to pull them (pyjamas) right up to my tummy button and fold them over so they don’t fall off. I have two pimples and a shiny […]
I’ve spent the majority of the year in tracksuit and windcheater covered in paint. I’ve also hit the last year of my thirties and have to not smile in photos to avoid the disappearance of eyes and the appearance of crows’ STOMP MARKS on my eye corners. I haven’t seen a hairdresser in a year and as for hair elsewhere, there’s every chance the RSPCA could step in on grounds of […]
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