I am very happy to be back, it’s been longer than I meant it to be. I had some important things to do like TURN 40. And of course I had to gather my wits and try to not get hysterical about said turning of 40. I did get a bit het up in the weeks leading up actually, and then the day came and I felt fine. 30 somethings are prone to a bit of hysteria I suppose, silly young things they are.
40 somethings, on the other hand, are far less flighty and much more interesting. They are apparently more confident in themselves, more clear about what they want and not afraid to ask for it. In that case, I’ll shortly be asking for a large vanilla ice cream with jelly beans stuck on, a tutu and a garden swing.
There are a few things I have come to terms with in the time I’ve been away, and one of them is that although I will age (more) in face and body, I am destined to be decidedly young in the head, for life. I can pretend to be all level-headed and learned, but I’m just not, never have been and never, I’m afraid, will be.
I can’t hold my own in a conversation about whether the current Government will bugger things up or not, or who is diddling on their election promises and why. I can’t get through the first few chapters of anything by Leo Tolstoy or Salman Rushdie (I can’t grasp all the names let alone the narrative). I don’t love David Lynch films or Morrissey’s music. I can’t bear pork belly or caviar. I have no fixed style but I’m not eclectic. I am not sophisticated in any way other than in the literal, able to process language and use tools way (not chainsaws or scientific calculators though) and I don’t think I could focus long enough to be an expert in anything. But you know what? Whether it’s because I have turned don’t-give-a-fuck forty, or because I’ve had a good hard look at myself, I don’t care.
I will still be a try-hard though, in that I will try hard to grasp the things that are beyond me if I think they are worth it. I will work to make sense of the things I am passionate about, but I will also stay passionate about nonsense, because a bit of silly makes everything alright. And because Roald Dahl said, “A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men”.
So this new megoracle, this weenie little spot on the interweb spectrum, will reflect that mission statement as best it can. With a bit of belly-achey tinged navelgazery on the side, because sometimes that’s the stuff that fulfils the greatest need. All the pieces I have written in the past are still here. Let me know if you find navigation tricky and I’ll do my best to guide you.
And because I’m no longer afraid to ask for stuff, I’m going to remind you that if you like what you see, please share. Because frankly I care whether or not people read what I write and if I can get a bigger audience I can get better leverage for future projects that I am dreaming of. And I might one day make a proper job of it and earn a bit of bob, without having to go back to wiping bottoms or re-educating myself useful.
Anyway, another one of my goals is not to waffle on too much, sooooo…
LIFE BEGINS. Yeeeeeehaaaaaaaa! xxx