“…the motherhood constellation is a mental organisation in which the child is most prominent…(also)…referred to as “primary maternal preoccupation.” – Winnicot, 1965; Stern 1995.
So there is a name for the totally mental disorganisation that is my brain after giving birth to and becoming full time mother to 3 children under 4 – The Motherhood Constellation (I am sorry Dads and stand-in grandparents that you have been excluded in the label – but here at Megoracle, consider yourselves well and truly in). My preoccupation with pram models, mushed up vegetables and bottom spots (theirs not mine – haven’t looked at my bare bottom in years) and my jittery-rush-rush anxiety when I am without my children has been officially labelled. And what’s more, it’s been afforded a noble function – to see our infants develop effectively and normally. So it seems my inability to hold a decent conversation for the last 5-ish years of my life will help my children turn into fine young specimens. Maybe it will negate the bad effects of being horribly drunk early in the first trimester when I had no idea there was a teeny person inside.
Anyway, my youngest is almost 2 and I’ve had about enough. My brain needs a total reboot. And here’s the exciting bit – the experience of motherly/parental love has proven (yes, by brainy scientists again) to actually make my brain grow larger. A study has found, “growth in midbrain regions involved with the experience of pleasure and in the prefrontal cortex, which is linked to reasoning, planning and judgment” (Time Magazine, 2010). Well I don’t know about the planning and judgment bit, but I’ll run with the big brain bit, even if there wasn’t all that much pleasure involved with morning sickness, shitting three house bricks and never sleeping.
So I repeat, my (big) brain needs a total reboot. I have had a niggly feeling that there are important things piling up in the newspaper basket only to be finger painted on or scrunched and burnt in the fire. But I have had neither time nor inclination to wade through complicated reportage with no context. I need my news with context you see, because I’ve missed the beginning of most important happenings that are shaping our history. And I need both context and news to be as digestible as the trash I’ve readily consumed of late. So I will do the research, unearth the beginnings of the big stories and find the context of today’s news, then re-write it in the language I am most comfortable with (which is the best way for me to retain it). I will then post it all here in case there are other contextually-challenged and large brained people out there.
And if anyone comes to visit, I’ll risk looking like a complete dumb fuck but you can sneakily read my context and puff yourselves up with superior “I knew that”-ness or with knowledge they didn’t have before.
So come along, have some contextual intercourse with me, I am your Oracle (wise and important cousel, with a Meg added because I am not very wise, swear too much and only important to a small few). Megoracle.
And here’s some things about me:
1) Who are you?
Meg Ashton Bignell (nee Warner, no relation of The Bros)
2) Where do you live?
On a dairy farm in Bream Creek – a very lovely green patch on the Eastern Edge of Tasmania (which is an Island at the bottom of Australia).
3) Who do you live there with?
My husband and my three children (5 year old hooligan twins and almost 2 year old tot who bites), plus a large herd of cows and some sheep but I rarely talk to them.
4) How old are you?
That is a very rude question. Somewhere around 35.
5) What do you do?
Another rather rude question (she says defensively because actually she doesn’t do much other than grumble about being a mother, cooker and cleaner and prance and dilly about in spare time being an actor and writer which really does no one any good does it?). I do all the things that come with mothering, wifing and keeping myself passionate.
6) What do you want to be when you grow up?
Sensible, useful, happy and able to fly.
7) What are some of your favourite things? (in no particular order)
Salt water, ice cream, big cars, sun, gardens, words, hugs, books, films, family, alone time, ball dresses, champagne, daphne, violets, clean sheets, fart jokes and musicals.
8 ) What are your least favourite things? (in no particular order)
Recorder music, bull fighting, pate, smelly car interiors, hession, maroon, contrivance, maths, putting ‘look’ in front of statements, hyper-materialism, hairdressers who don’t know when to be shut up, when children are sick, pimples and my toes.
9) What are your favourite swear words? (in order)
Fuck, shit, damn, poop, bollocks, bum, balls, crap, cockhead and nuts.
I think that’ll do. You will see more of me in the silly bits of writing I add to this website, just because I do lots of silly bits of writing and I might as well share some.
Here’s what I look like (when I’m smiling at the floor):